ERIN WRESTLED WITH JUST WHAT KIND OF SLUT SHE WANTED TO BE

LOL LOL. I love you Amy Odell, whoever you are!!

I think The City is just gonna get better and better.

"Last night on The City the rift between the Uptowners and Downtowners deepened, as Olivia enacted a Blair Waldorf–esque scheme for the sole purpose of making Whitney feel like a loser. Jay and Nevan showcased wit we never knew they had, with cutting attacks on each other's social spheres. Erin wrestled with just what kind of slut she wanted to be. The slut with an ongoing affair? Or the slut who needs a break from working street corners to find herself? Whitney, meanwhile, sat around and took a lot of shit. As usual, there was much to learn."

"Lesson 1: Bridging the uptown/downtown divide."


Link to continue. There is a lot to learn from The City indeed. The genius of this NY Mag writeup by Amy Odell is that it is ONE HUNDRED PERCENT true that if you combine the lessons of Gossip Girl with the lessons of The City, you basically have a fundamental working knowledge of New York, and can then get on with your day. I can say this with full credentials, having nearly, just nearly, hit my decade-in-New-York mark (only a couple years to go).


Excerpts of lessons from this article that are genius:

-"Lesson 2: Hailing a cab.
Do: Raise your hand in the air at a slight angle to your head."

-"It’s difficult for a person without uptown money to suddenly look like they have it, but a person with uptown money can easily pretend like they don't have it. It’s the founding principle of modern Williamsburg, after all."

-"Lesson 4: Being on time.
Do: Speak up if a bitch is making you late."

-"Do: Attack when the victim is alone and vulnerable. While Olivia, Nevan, and Whitney watch Jay's awful band play, Nevan provides running hysterical commentary on their ugly plaid ensembles. "We're not in the Yukon. Are they going to cut a forest after this?" he says. Whitney pouts but says nothing. A true diva would tell Olivia that wearing plaid is better than looking like a stuffed peacock, and Nevan that he’s too gross to get some even from loose-goose Erin."

-"Don’t: Go back to an ex who bartends at Brother Jimmy’s."

-"Do: Outwit your enemy. Olivia tells Whitney that Jay should have “done his research” on how to dress for her function. Because no one ever wears plaid to the Gansevoort. Olivia shuts Whitney up before she realizes she’s not green enough to be fooled by this. “In the future, let's leave our work environment separate from our personal environment," she says, thereby owning Whitney for the zillionth time."